I am constantly finding myself thinking about how I can stop here from being that girl with the bad reputation (read: being known as the slutty chick in school), how do I keep her away from drugs, what can I do to make sure she picks the right type of guys, and how can I ensure she never listens to country music.
The sad fact is that there is no real, for sure way to guarantee any of those things. I think it just comes down to being active in your child’s life and letting them know you love them and care about them. That and a plethora of threats to do bodily harm.
I once read that the most important relationship a girl can have is the one she has with her father. They rationalize this by saying that a girl, from a young age, develops her sense of men and relationships from how their fathers treat women and their level of involvement within the relationship. In short, if their dad treats the mother (and other women) with no regard or respect, the daughter will expect to be treated the same way and accept it when it happens. On the other hand, if she sees her father treating women the way they should be, they expect the same out of their partner. Seems legit, right? Michelle said she agrees with the theory, but I think she just wants me to fawn over her for the rest of out lives. Regardless, if she ever does lose her mind and come home with a Kevin Federline type, I feel I can convince him, in a calm and deliberate manner, that perhaps they are not the best match.
As far as drugs and sex, well, I am praying she is born with a strong common sense trigger. Michelle and I are going to raise her letting her know her value as a person and that she shouldn’t do anything to her body that could destroy it. That it’s OK to say no and what high school kids think means exactly shit. That it takes more guts to walk away from a fight and that leaders don’t compromise themselves. That one thing she will always have is her character and only she can take that away. That having values is better than having any object and that they will only help her succeed in life. That it’s good to be humble and believe in something bigger than you, like God, even though expressing and being proud of your beliefs might not be the cool thing to do at the time, but in the long run it will help you through harder times and let you be more thankful during the good times. That failing to prepare is preparing to fail (my favorite quote). That doing the right thing is not always the easiest thing. That hard work is the only way to truly achieve anything worthwhile. And that she should have the highest standards when it comes to how she should be treated.
Ava ETA Update: As of Michelle’s last doctors visit on Thursday, she is about 1.5 cm dialated. This means we are probably within two weeks of meeting Ava. I can’t wait, how ’bout you?