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I Will Use My Daughter to Get What I Want

I am a bit of a geek, proudly stated. I like Star Wars and Star Trek. I like comic books and nature documentaries. And I LIKE museums. Whether they are art museums, natural history museums, science museums, or the Pez museum. I like them all.

Now, when it comes to my interest in the comic books or Star Trek, I can enjoy those on my own. The museums are a different story. Sure I can go on my own, but that is time away from Michelle (you would be surprised at how two working people can live together and still get little quality time during the week) and who wants to go out by themselves anyway. The problem is that museums are not Michelle’s favorite places. She doesn’t really have anything against them, it’s just that she doesn’t see the excitement in them that I do and she can think of a hundred other things to do on a nice day. That, and the fact she associates museums with work, being a teacher, she has been to her share.

So usually I can only get my museum fix a few times a year, on bad weather days, when there is literally nothing else to do. That will all change now. Ava will be my little partner in crime. What kid doesn’t like going to museums to see dinosaur bones? Michelle just got outnumbered.

I figure the conversations will go something like this:

“Hey honey, Ava wants to go to the museum today.”

Michelle with an annoyed look on her face, “Oh come on. I don’t want to go again.”

“All right, but you have to be the one to tell her. I don’t see what you have against our daughter learning about history and art anyway.”

“This is the third time this month.”

“Actually it’s the fourth. A couple of days ago we took a quick trip to the Science Museum while you were at parent/teacher night. It’s a crappy day anyway, come on.”

“How about we just stay in and watch a movie and play games together?”

“Maybe, but she really wants to go.  Look at her.” (I signal Ava to put on a pout face)

“I hate you and what you have turned our daughter into.”

“Ava, get your jacket. Mommy said yes!!!!!!” 

There are only two problems with my plan. The first is that I can’t use it right away. I will have to wait a year or two. Ava will have to grow. I could possibly try to play the angle that you can never start learning too soon and I can make-up some bullshit about a study that found that kids who go to museums at a very early age grow up to be geniuses. That just might be crazy enough to work.

The second potential problem is Ava’s genetics. Half of it will come from Michelle, so there is a very real possibility that Ava might look at museums the same way Michelle does. I can only pray that the geeky museum gene is dominant and not recessive.



About mikevi29

I was just a guy, now I am going to be a dad. *gulp*

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