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My Little Stink Bug…

Today is Halloween!

I’m all for any day where free candy is passed out that isn’t from the back of a shady looking van (I’ll never make that mistake again). Far removed from tick-or-treating myself, recent Halloweens were usually spent over my sister’s house hanging out with my niece and nephew (Olivia and Nate) and picking through their candy when they weren’t looking.

Now Ava has made all the great things about the holidays new again, especially the stuff that was really fun when you were a kid. Halloween is no exception and it’s only the start. Ava is a little over three months old, so there are only a few Halloween activities we can actually do with her right now. We bought her a lady bug costume. We marched with her in a community parade behind a fire truck. We took pictures with her at a pumpkin patch. After that there isn’t much left to do besides look at her over and over and confirm to each other just how cute she looks in her costume.

Michelle did take Ava into her school where they have a big Halloween parade and party for the students every year. Michelle was very excited about showing Ava off to all her co-workers and parents. Apparently Ava was just as excited, if not more so, because when they got there Ava took a poop so big that it escaped her diaper like Andy Dufresne in ‘The Shawshank Redemption’. It was such a powerful poop that it went all the way up her back and into her lady bug costume. Michelle’s mom had the line of the day pointing out that she was a sting bug instead of a lady bug. The costume was so caked with poo that I literally had to hose it off before we put it in the wash. Well done Ava, you’re making your daddy proud at such a young age.

Perhaps next year she will be able to actually collect candy. Michelle and I are really looking forward to the times when we can start doing the other really fun things with her. Carving pumpkins. Baking pumpkin bread, pumpkin pie and pumpkin cookies. Taking hay rides. Egging houses. Letting her climb on the pumpkins at Trax. Costume parties. All that good stuff.

The two prettiest girls I know

Michelle and I have to remind our selves all the time to pump the breaks and enjoy what we can with her now. We tend to get ahead of ourselves and wish we can do the other, older Ava stuff now. Though when she does get bigger and we take her around trick-or-treating, I told Michelle I plan on mixing kid and adult Halloween. Kid Halloween consists of all the innocent, fun activities like: dressing up as a cute character, candy, carving pumpkins, baking, etc. Adult Halloween involves dressing up like a moron and drinking. So the plan is to do all the Ava stuff, but as we are trick-or-treating, I will of course be dressed in something ridiculous and taking with me a wagon filled with assorted alcoholic beverages. I will encourage other parents, who have yet to join the two versions of Halloween, to help themselves to my wagon of cheer.

Who knows, maybe we can make a drinking game out of it. Every Reeces is a shot of bourbon. A bag of M&Ms is a shot of gin. Whats that? You got a Mallo Cup? Too bad, that’s three shots of Tequila my friend. A king size of anything means you chug a beer. You will be lucky to find your way home by the end of the night. I will probably have to have a designated trick-or-treater to be sure I make it home safe.

Everyone have a happy Halloween and stay safe out there. Watch out for the kids, unless you see one dressed as Ovechkin, Vick or Brady, be sure to swerve towards them and give them a good scare.


About mikevi29

I was just a guy, now I am going to be a dad. *gulp*

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