Ava is just about seven months old now and for a seven month old baby she seems to have the strength of a ‘roided-up Hulk.
What do I mean? If Ava is cranky or fussy and doesn’t feel like cooperating with whatever it is that Michelle and I are trying to do with her, she easily overpowers us when push comes to shove.
Wether we are trying to dress her, change her, feed her, bathe her, clean her nose, or take something away from her, Ava is like a little ball of power. She wiggles, squirms, rolls, clutches, kicks, and fuses. It is quite an impressive array of tactics.
The most astonishing thing though is that she can just plain over power me. She uses my love for her against me. When I am trying to hold her still for something or trying to maneuver her head/arms/legs for some reason, she usually gets the best of me because I think she knows I’m afraid to snap one of her arms or legs in half.
It’s a weird game of chicken. The old unstoppable force versus the immovable object. However, it seems my unstoppable force has hair-trigger brakes when it comes to Ava.
You think maneuvering a baby would be easy, that they would succumb to your will with ease. Think again. Their will is stronger than yours. Their muscles are more elastic and newer than yours, and their fortitude is much, much greater than yours.
Even more impressive is her grip. Anyone that has held Ava knows that if she gets your hair, face, nose, or any other sensitive upper body part in her grasps, you are in for a world of hurt. It’s like she uses one of those hand-grip exerciser things all day in her crib, building her hand’s gripping power.
Ava is at the point where she has figured out how her hand works, as well as gotten her hand/eye coordination down pretty well. Combine that with a keen understand and development of her depth perception and now she wants to grab and pick-up everything within reach.
That is fine. The problem is getting it out of her grasp. Her hand and fingers lock on an object like the jaws of a great white shark. Getting her to loosen her grip takes an effort just short of using a crow-bar.
In an attempt to manipulate her at an early age, I am thinking of buying one of those miniature souvenir bats and letting her hold onto it all day. That way she gets used to holding a bat in her hands and hopefully developes a great swing by the time we sign her up for softball. I already bought her a softball to hold and play with. If she is going to play for the US National Softball Team, these skills need to be honed early.
Don’t judge me. Yes, I know I am making those “tiger-moms” look like a bunch of pussy cats (see what I did there), but I have some unrealized dreams that I have to experience through someone right? Right.
The only sport these days I am in shape enough for (read: In no shape at all) is curling.
Today is also Valentine’s Day. I would like to just give a shout-out to my wife Michelle who I love more than life itself. She is my better half. The butter to my bread. Michelle gave me Ava and that is a gift she will never top. Ava is my little angel. The frosting on my cake. She makes my life sweeter and fills it with happiness. Her smile makes all my troubles disappear. Ava, daddy loves you very much.